bak to my bad mood.....for all who come near i must convey da words.....take care...be careful
i've really come to despise myself, but yet again, i have no intention of changing. i look onto everyone i know, all i feel dat all dey want from meh is to change myself. outta spite, i do not change cause it feels like an unknown force is pressuring meh for change. i have come to despise myself, and everyone and everything around meh. all the things i used to treasure are now worthless. i live aimlessly just walking and talking....about what???? nothing!!!! i will cry now, i will live on, in unhappiness. no one understands. no one accepts me. why can't they all just leave meh be and be the person i am. i am a person of thought. i think. thats just da way i am. no one understands. yeah yeah...i noe....GOD is always dere....he always understand.....i noe he can..... what i need now is just a constant person who will be my friend in time of need. one that will be here physically to listen and help me. i guess i'm just a gurl wit alot of depression problems. but even if so, what can i do??? go take sum prozak?!?!?!? what good will dat do aye?!?!? what??? so i can get addicted to some drug just so dat i wun feel like shit all da time?!?!?! if dat's da case....i'd rather just feel like shit.....if u dun understand meh, i advise stay away, u can't help me. if u can't accept unhappiness, den i warn, run far far away. if u can't do both.....i say......go away from meh forever.....don't even try to understand meh....i dun need ur effort.....i don't need ur loving if dat' s what u think i lack.....i need nothing from u.....u can't offer meh n e thing i want. i just wanna feel at peace with myself....i will never achieve peace....but da point being is dat i am trying....u just dun see dat. well i'm leaving now....l8a
in dis world...i've found out sum new stuff
dere are a few types of peeps....let's see......
1) da type dat genuinly cares and gives u dere heart and always wanting da best for ya, not wishing to change u cause dey love u da way u are
2) dere is a type of person dat understands you and just doesn't like u....and if dey had da chance to get to noe u....dey only wanna take advantage and change u into sumone else....
3) dere are types of peeps dat dun care at all....dun give a shit if u get hurt, dun care if u are happy or not
4) there are those dat are unable to demonstrate the affection. they care alot and hurt alot when u are hurt, but just can't show it
5) the type dat just doesn't understand you and just can't because dey dun accept you
6) those that seem to love you, but when u turn ur bak, dey stab ur bak...