cold...

tired tired tired...grr grrr grrr...

oh wellz...XPXPXP

change

with all that's going on in life....it looks like 2 months of the new year has passed...and we are already in the 3rd month of 2005. can you believe it?!?!

time flies sooo fast...

and now...it's time for me to go to uni soon....in a matter of another 3 months or so i should be finished hs....how fun aye?.....sighs.....

i never knew what i did wrong then...and now when i look back at certain old memories...all i can do is fill up with tears on the inside. i didn't know what i did wrong then, i still don't know what i did wrong now. what hurts the most, you thought i was a betrayer...you thought i was a user...you said you trusted me and you knew me...and so....it seems it was all a lie. a sham to cover up your harboured feelings toward me.

you call me the "fag" of the situation. you call me the greatest "bitch" of the world. and so it seems, i will never change your mind...but nor do i think i want to waste my time n e more.

my life has changed. i have matured some what. but with this maturity comes knowlege, rights and responsibilities. but what you don't understand that even though you have pushed me aside, you think you have forgotten and you won't remember, one day, the memories of of our friendship with come back to haunt you and you will figure out how shitty you treated your "friends". you say your friends are true to you now...maybe some are, but i am sure there are those that will not stick to you like many have done in the past. you can try to forget, but your past won't die like that.

you say you have split personalities...so does everyone else...you're not that special. you once told me the same thing...stop thinking only you go through this stuff. and you know what? i express myself so others can comfort...if you didn't want to...don't drag me down into your misery. at least i don't deny that i'm in pain. at least i don't deny that i need help. at least i don't deny i have anger management issues. at least i don't deny i'm tooo sensitive. at least i don't deny that i'm selfish. at least i don't deny that i'm just who i am and i am just who i am.

sighs.....i have wished you all the best in life when we parted ways, i wish you all the best now....

fun fun fun

wow.....unparalled...muhahh!!! hope matt does well today in his ryerson interview thingy. muhaha. he still owes me a picture of miss. monkey lady!!! muhahaha. yupz yupz. how fun. presentation went alrights today. feel sooo loved. they gave me an 80....and they had 70 and 72....wow...feel sooo loved....yaya!!! muhahah.

what the hey....meagan didn't even come to present today...what the hey in flipping hell?!?!? args=.= i hadda bs my way even more than i already had too....grrrr....oh wellz...so my midterm mark for english is gonna be slightly inflated.....wow....thanx alot you guyz.....sooo love you guys for thinking sooo highly of me. muhahahaha. and that i deserve the mark...thanx thanx...

sighs...feel kinda bad for meagan though...she literally has a 0 now. because she didn't come out for the presentation...args. i know she had her part done...but to mrs. seeliger, skipping is an ultimate 0 whatever the excuse. args....sighs....i feell sooo bad....and the guys don't think she deserves n e marks because she skipped....i still feel bad none the less.....

i didn't give her a zero....i just wrote no mark for her part. because well....i hadda save my skin and bs the rest of the entire presentation.....but then again...mrs seeliger may not think i deserve the mark the guys gave me....but it's alrights...no biggie problems...i really hate how i sound when i do presentations...i stutter alot...i mean alot.....sighs.....

wukakakaka!!!!

args...what the hell is wrong with blogger these days...

every time i try to post stuff....it like gives me that stupid status....freaking hell....grrrr.....

well n e whoo...feeling sick to my stomach. english presentation too. anxiety doesn't help things...that's all....

wukakakaka!!!!

well now, i have an english presentation next period. kinda getting nervous...and my stomach is starting to hurt. or maybe it's because of the soup i had to drink this morning. hm.....or maybe it was the wonton noodles i had yesterday. that's probably it. i didn't eat n e thing else except that stuff yesterday. i was sooo pissed off because my daddy didn't wanna cook, so just made noodles...noodles that i ate about 3 hours before because i ate lunch at 2....

args...stupid "gan sui"=.= grrr....which basically means soap water...args....feeling sooo sick now...and my anxiety doesn't help this matter either. grrrr....

well in a good mood...sooo looking forward to going to jean's...sooo looking forward to watch the incredibles....soooo looking forward to go to t dot....so not looking forward to my respiratory examination=.=

well hm...n e one have plans that they'd like to invite me to?!?! does n e one not have plans and wanna make plans?