Saturday, October 18, 2003

as i read alot of pagies. all i can say is that i'm a crowd of people that need some way out from the emotional torment that they put on themselves. we strain ourselves to understand, we strain ourselves to care, or not care. we strain ourselves to be different, or follow the crowd. most times, we just wanna have a page, so we get a pagie. most times, it was just a trend, and eventually, to some people, it looses it's meaning or thought, or maybe there never wuz anything to begin with. i simply just have a pagie for my thoughts, because i don't say things to my friends n e more. they know i'm damaged or hurting, but i'll come out and say it, why? because sadness and despair is something that u'll get annoyed of very easily. you can lie to urself saying that u'll be there to listen, but i've gotten sick of it. it's not that i don't care, but sometimes all the people that talk to me is talk about there problems. i'm just there to help, it's as if i'm never there when they're happy, and i'm only there when they're hurt or sumthing. i don't blame em, cause i constantly need to run somewhere for a release. no one really ever talks to meh. over the skool year, i'm like loosing friends, and gaining friends that i shouldn't be hanging around with. i feel like i'm getting worst everyday. i run away from reality more and more often now. it's sooo not good. my stomach really hurts now. it's really really in pain. considering dat i haven't ate much since like tuesday. my mouth is like all swollen on one side. it hurts. stupid widom teeth. sighs sighs. i miss you peeps sooooo muchie. but when i'm with you people, i just hate it like crazy. it's sooo weird. sighs sighs. l8a yoz

No comments: