anger

ahhhhhh!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I JUST WANT TO GO....AHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

all this frustration.....AH!!!!!!!!!!

i just broke out in fits of anger today....AH!!!!!!!!!!!!

AHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!

all i can see is what my brain is thinking. the following will be what i see. i see sabina running around in the basement. she is pulling her hair and running in circles. she goes up to walls and bangs her head a few hundred times. she's screaming....running.....screaming....running....panting...more running and screaming....her head hurts like no tomorrow. she's tired. she's frustrated.....AHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

i am refering to myself in the third person in my own blog....what the hell? AHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!

my dad said i should have pressed on the gas while i was making the turn....and i flipped, "the last time when i was in this situation, you told me to have just waited and not make the turn. i should have waited for all the cars to pass and turn....NOT PRESS THE GAS!!!! what is it that you want me to do? you should have just walked, i can't please you...i woke up early to drive you...and you think it was a mistake to have not pressed on the gas. the last time, i pressed on the gas you were like that was a shitty turn. and this time i made a really good and safe turn you are like, you should have pressed the gas so it would have still been a green light." ARGS!!!! I CAN'T FREAKING PLEASE MY OLD MAN!!!!=.= AHH!!!!!!!!!!! no matter what i do he doesn't think i'm good enough. he doesn't trust my decisions. he doesn't like my logic. AH!!!!!!!! i am the same as him in the only aspect that i think alot and i am his blood line.....ahhhhhhh........besides that....my sister will be the only person he will ever love....i don't understnad it....i just can't please him.....AHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!

AHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

*banging brain against skull* AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


GOING FREAKING CRAZY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!

frustrated at what i feel for the people i shouldn't have feelings for!!!! AHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!

everything i do is a mistake.....i want to say i am a mistake....but i know this is not true.....i am still the clay within the Father's hands being molded and shaped to be the perfect masterpiece......but.....AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!