how can i say this? i haven't felt soo well in my lyphe. i mite be sick and unhealthy, but i have not been so happy in such a long time. i guess since i am sorta making myself to be a certain way, it feels alrite. i can't live a lyphe ful of sorrow. or can i?? well i don't wanna noe. wha da heck is lyphe for if all i do is like make myself suffer? i thank everyone one of u. yes, u prolly got soo mad at meh cause i always put myself down, put everything happening to meh to such bad odds. i'm sorry, but i thank you all for still being here for me.

here are my list of thank yous

first and foremost, to GOD, my savior, my creator, my stregnth, my hope, my everything. You are the only one that noes my heart. You are my father who noes the outcome. You noe what i can handle and what i can't. Only You can bring meh out of n e situation. even the four words "thank you very much" can't really compare to all You've done for meh. but all the same, my heart is yours because u first loved meh even when i wuz a sinner. THANX.....

baby joy- ur support for everything i do and what i can't do is special, u prolly dunno, but thank you. thank you soo muchie. love ya happy gurly....hehehe=>:D

jeannie baby- thanx for being there and just listening to my crap ass stupid stuff. u never say n e thing, and i noe ur always just asking why i am soo down all the time. that i have no answer to too, but i thank you all the same. thanx for being there even if, all u can do is listen and say nothing. thanx......love ya my jeannie poo.....hahaha=>:D

baby jenny- hey gurly, u dunno how much u mean to meh. you're like the only one at skool dat actually noes meh sooo well. i noe u always ask the question of why i'm so unhappy or why i think so unhappily. you noe i can't really answer you. if it weren't for u at skool, i'd prolly have like already quit and dropped out by now la. thanx for being there for meh. thanx for being my friend. thanx for giving meh a reason to go to skool. thanx for everything u've done for meh. thanx and love ya jenny gurl.

alfred boi- ur philosophy of lyphe is sooo rite. it is da philosophy of many peeps. and by many, i noe.....i've heard enuff peeps say it to noe. the time u said it to meh on msn means more than just ur philosophy ba. dat i am completely serious, ur words just changed meh. unlike n e one else who have said the same thing, it just hit meh. you dunno how much your words mean to meh rite now, but thank you sooooo much

bri boi- thanx for being there for meh. thanx for being like the brother i never had, giving me wise advice. thank you. there is still sooo much that i need to say, but words just can't describe my greatfulness. all together......4 words.......THANK YOU VERY MUCHIE!!!! wait.....maybe 4 more.......love ya bri boi

kenning- hehehehe=>:D well u dunno it, the conversation really helped, being able to express everything outta myself felt better. i guess i've never really told much of myself out to you like dat, but thanx for lending a listening ear and a helpful heart and hand. thanx. hehehe=> thank ya......

willy boi- i noe i piss da shit outta u all da time. i noe i'm as depressing as hell. i'm sorry. but through ur anger, u noe what? i've seen alot. hahaha=>:D by the time or if u even actually read this, u might still angery at meh, but actually, overnite, i'm different. hahaha=>:d maybe only for a short time being (hopefully not), but thank you altogether. u mite be saying why am i thanking you? but the answer is, u already noe for what. thanx a million, willy.

^for the list above, i'm sorry, i dunno how many other peeps helped, but i thank each and everyone of u did and tried, no effort no matter how small is ever wasted. everyone of u peeps are my angels without wings. no words can express. i thank you all. love u and give my heart to u peeps.



now continueing on. i've found myself. i'm now in a happier place. well not dead of course or i wun be typing dis, but i'm happier den before at least. and dis.....will last, why? because as ken said to meh, use every action, thought, and word every effort of you to be happy. and it took a week to actually hit meh. guess i will use every bit of meh to be happy. and eventually....it wun need to be an 100% try....it will just be me. well thanx. i am happier den before. hehehe=>:D ^^ :P ^____________________^ yupz....long smile form. hahaha=>:d luv ya'll....l8a