happiness

happiness is not brought on by the things that we have. happiness is not brought on by the people we have around us. happiness is not simply a smile on your face.

happiness is a state of mind that causes us to have a better outlook on the grim side of life. happiness is what allows us to move on and be strong and pray for better times. happiness is something we can't avoid.

but on the same spectrum. what is sadness and depair?

if happiness is a state of mind, then simply sadness is too. then if happiness causes us to have a better outlook, then sadness would cause a grimmer outlook then. if happiness allows us to move on be strong and pray, then sadness would just cause the different effect. sadness would cause weakness and we will can't move on because we don't have the energy or whatnot. but, like happiness, sadness is something we can't avoid.

meh.....it doesn't matter. nothing matters. by simply saying it doesn't matter, it's just another excuse to try and not care. and that's the conflict between me everyday. i want to care for those that don't seem to deserve it. i want to care for those that don't seem to care for me. and really....but now, it's rather hard.

i'm starting to distance myself away again because i'm hurt. i'm tired. being happy takes tooo much energy.

simply putting on a mask to hide things doesn't mean that they are okay. it's not being selfish if you need to get things off your chest because things hit you hard once in a while. people deal with everything differently. if your method works for one thing, it may not work for the next. are you trying to deny the fact that you want someone to care?