hm.....predictablility....not everyone is predictable......keke^^ sighs sighs. i'm scared beyond wits....i don't know what to say....i don't know what to do....sighs sighs.... hm. was supposed to go out and do something....but obviously she had other plans. it's kind of funny. i don't seem to want to do anything. i'm in no mood and i'm feeling grumpy. no it's not pms.....don't even ask. but whatever. normally on days like this....i would be furious at the person who set up the plans and didn't call me back. but today.....i'm in no mood. all i want to do is to be in a corner and cry everything out. i just want to understand why people'll have changed into such miserable forms. sighs sighs. all i want to do is cry. all i want to do is be alone, but be around my friends. sighs sighs. i want to run away, but what will i accomplish if i run away? nothing....absolutely nothing. you won't pick up your stupif fricken cell phone....and i've been calling since 2 in the morning of today. you haven't picked up....where the hell are you?!?!

args, you've got me frustrated. my parents are mad at me because i feel shitty and am unwilling to do antying....args....you make me angry....but who am i angry at??? myself? i prolly am. i feel like walking to the ends of the earth and never looking back....args...just leave me alone, but on second thought....i don't want to be alone.....sighs.

by loving someone you are giving that person the power to destroy you, but with that love comes forgiveness and trust....you trust that they will not destroy you.....but also....if they do, and you sincerely love them...you have ultimate power to forgive. WE LOVE BECAUSE GOD FIRST LOVED US. sighs sighs. as my road seems to be coming to an abrubt end....i feel as if i cannot shed enuff tears of the world.i should not be shedding tears of greive, but i can't help it. i feel soo burdened, but burdened of what? is it because i see humanity crumbling before my very own eyes? is it because i see humanity has lost all road? is it because i see humanity coming to a quick halt in the dark? why is it that i'm sooo troubled? why is it that i am in so much pain? why is it that i no long feel satisfied with the very things that i enjoy? why is everything so tasteless to me now? what is wrong with me? why is it that when i'm alone i wish to be in the company of friends, but when i'm in the company of friends, all i wish for is to be alone by myself? why?!?! is my only good companion myself?!?!? sighs.