at this very moment.....thoughts of everything and nothing come to my mind. my tears are still endless, but only within my heart. pain hits me like a slap across the face. sadness slowly reaps its way into my joints. i can't move....i'm sitting still typing away at the thoughts i wanna get out, but can't turn into words. i've become depressed. it's not sadness i tell you....because i noe no sadness, only in others do i see it.....i don't see sadness within myself....i see depression....i've only seen extreme emotions in meh.....besides anger that is......there are two stages to my anger.....half annoyed anger and total anger....total sadness which equals to that of depression and extreme joy....oh yes.....the feeling of nothing, or nuetral...the feeling of having no feelings. so extreme to the point that i feel useless and worthless which turns meh depressed, but whatever....the fact is....i'm a very extreme person. i see things in ways many people won't want meh to see em in. i'm not lacking in love, i receive love from almost everyone that i meet. i make friends easily, dis i noe well....for the fact that i'm willing to talk....but really.....maybe i share too much....people become afraid of meh.....but if you really cared about the person i am and the person i can become in CHRIST....then maybe u wun be afraid. jenny, brian, jean, bessie....where are you???? sighs.....ur one of those people that get sick of listening to my unhappiness/complaints but still sit there and listen only because u can't do n e thing for meh....u can only show meh sumthing, but it dun mean u'll get meh outta dat phase. can someone give meh a hug? i really need one.......sighs.....tears are welling up in my eyes now.....what must i do, what must i say.....i am too sensitive. maybe i have a chronic depression disorder or sumthing.....i feel this way a bit tooo often. i thought it wuz skool that wuz what caused meh to feel this way....because skool gives meh stress....but now i noe.....i feel this way only because i do and i can. sighs....i wanna be left alone....but yet i want people to be around meh....i'm afraid of being left behind....please....don't ever leave meh.....i can't take it if another person left my lyphe.....i just can't.....i'm falling apart at the seams as it already is.....i couldn't tolerate it if it happened.....help meh please.....i noe i need help.....